Cursillo

Sometimes it takes an outside force to get you to do something about your spiritual life. Now as Fr. said yesterday in his homily, in the case of Jonah and the city of Nineveh, it took an outside force that was not exactly happy about the idea of saving the people he thought deserved to be punished but good ol' Jonah got spit back out to go do what the Lord asked. Man...follow directions, deliver His message or else. Fr.'s point was that sometimes we hear from the people we do not like, or who do not like us, what we need to hear to straighten out our lives. How do we take it? Personally I was ticked when told by someone I do not care much for that I was a cafeteria Catholic, ya know, pick and choose what I want to follow in the Catholic Church. I was angry. Angry enough to change. Angry not to realize it myself. But, God has a way. He sends us all we need when and where we need it. We just have to accept the message and the messenger. When I read "Jesus at My Side" today, which I know allllllll of you have copies of, I was reminded of a time when I thought I knew it all and was so spiritually rich that I did not need what others had to offer. I did at least like all these people but I'm so clueless. Here ya go:

“Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.”

Matt 5:3

When I made the retreat weekend called Cursillo, in my mind I was already full of all that could be given to me.  I went because my mother signed me up.  I was full of information and knowledge and could answer questions at my assigned table and had so much to offer the other people in this building.  Three days of this and I imagined that I would be bursting with pride of how much I could share about Jesus and our call here on this earth and our response to that call.  By the second day, my throat was so tight, I literally could only speak at a whisper.  I am allergic to feathers and although I’d brought my own pillow, the shelves above where I was sleeping were filled with old feather pillows.  My voice was gone.  While I listened, because that was all I could do, I myself was filled for the day and a half I had left with all that Jesus wanted me to hear.  He literally shut me up to fill me up.  I lay empty before all these women and I was filled. 

Jesus says that those who are aware of their own spiritual poverty, those who understand that they are nothing without Him, are those who are blessed.  He has the gift of Heaven waiting for those who let go of their pride and depend solely on Him.  We empty ourselves of our will and allow Him to fill us with His will. We are nothing without God. Let go.