“Put out into deep water and lower your nets for a catch.”
Driving to work yesterday I had a V8 moment. Ever get those? Where you've been doing something for years or searching for something and all the sudden the Holy Spirit hits you right between the eyes and you pop yourself on the forehead.
I've been feeling lax in my "close personal relationship with God." Wanting something more for years. Waking earlier, making visits, attending retreats, daily Mass, reading, writing, praying, etc. etc. etc. AND, yesterday as I was driving to work I had a flash of all the attempts in my life to do something more and all the regrets I've had that I didn't. The easiest example is my regret over not playing college basketball. I was asked to play at a small local college and I actually showed up at a couple of practices at another university after a full Freshman year of too much drinking and too much eating. I used to joke that if they could just wagon me down the court, I could sink a shot from anywhere they needed. I had all the right desires and all the right dreams but none of the complete work ethic. Everyone has something they really want in life but how many of us truly and honestly go out to the deep and cast our nets where Jesus tells us. To the deep. He doesn't just ask us to want something more, but He does ask us to work for something more. I give up too quickly because I get no instant gratification. Pop me in the head. It's been like this with my entire life. My high school performances, my college choices, my marriage, my kids and my spiritual life. I want and I dream and I see others I wish I were like but my efforts fall short. Today I begin again and each day I will begin again to go to the deep. God does not want part of what I have to give and if I want a close personal relationship, I'll have to give Him my all every day and in all I do. I shoulda had a V8 years ago, but today I begin again.